7 Powerful steps to creating change in your life
I turned 40 this year and all of a sudden life as I knew it just didn’t feel like it was enough anymore. As clichéd as it sounds, I felt like I was having a mid life crisis.
I can definitely blame it on a combination of life events over the past 5 years; getting married, having a child, going back to school and growing a business. But when my son started to give me some breathing room, the wedding planning had ended, and my business was cruising, I suddenly felt like for the first times in a long time I could say, “Hey what do I want?” Besides the usual money, health and happiness, what was important to me?
We tend to get pretty comfy in our day to day lives and change can be hard. I know this because part of my job is helping women create lasting change in their lives. I understand that the right tools need to be in place and you need to be in the right head space to succeed.
Today I am going to let you in on my seven most powerful steps on how to make real change in your life. I know they work not only because I see it with clients but I am currently practicing what I preach and making some big changes in my life too!
1. Write down the what and why!
Your first step is to get clear on exactly what you want to change and why? We can have a countless thoughts swimming around our heads about what we would like to change; I need to get organized, I need to lose weight, I should read more, I need a new job, I need bigger biceps. It’s endless! When it comes to making real change in your life you need to decide exactly what the change is going to be and why. It’s not enough to write down “I want to lose weight”. If that is your goal I want you to ask yourself why? Is it to have more energy, play more with your kids, fit into clothes? List your reasons why and get into detail. Get behind the feeling of why you want to change that specific issue in your life. You can use this down the road for when things might get tough as a good reminder why you are doing what you are doing.2. What does the future hold?
If you don’t get that new job or you don’t lose that weight or you don’t take that trip what will the future look like? Where will you be in a year, in two or 10 years if you don’t make this change? Will you still be miserable in the same job making the same amount of money? Will you continue gaining weight possibly developing a chronic illness like type two diabetes? This can be a big reality check and is one of my favorite "change" self diagnosis tools. Follow it up with "what does the future hold if you do make those changes?" A new job could be more freedom, earlier retirement, happier working environment. Losing weight could mean more confidence, energy to do the things you want. Write it all down!3. Educate yourself
When I need to learn something new, I proudly google the crap out of it! I find the people, the facts, the science - the anything on the subject I need to find to educate myself. Make it your job to do the same! Read the books, hire the right person, take the course and gather all the tools and information you will need to succeed.4. Get rid of limiting belief
Nothing will take you down faster than your own belief system. “I am fat and will never lose weight - it’s too hard” “Who am I to make millions?” “I can’t hire a house keeper people would think I am lazy”. “I can’t leave my spouse - how would I support myself and my kids would suffer”. Hmmmmm any of those sound familiar? What we constantly tell ourselves or what we were told as children can be etched into us without even realizing! Next time you are sitting around with that negative self-talk ask yourself “IS THAT TRUE?” Is it too hard to lose weight? People do it all the time! You deserve to make millions just as much as the next guy! Do you really care what so and so thinks if you don’t clean your own house? Would your kids be unhappy? Or would you be teaching them to never stay in a loveless marriage because it sucks!5. Create your road map
Write down the steps you will need to take to accomplish the changes. Some maps might be a lot larger than others depending on how big the change is. You may need to set up smaller, more immediate goals that build on your efforts to reach the final destination. Be realistic and start with baby steps and don’t be hard on yourself if you need to change direction or slow down, no problem, the map can always change.6. Desire Vs. MUST have
Now you know WHAT you're changing. You know WHY. You're ditching the negative self-talk. You have all the tools in place and the map to get there! Now ask yourself.... is this a desire or a must have? Some of the biggest things in my life I knew I was not going to compromise having. I knew I MUST have kids. I knew I was travelling the world, I was buying a house, I was going to be a Rolfer and then a nutritionist. I knew these things without a shadow of a doubt and I went after them and nothing stopped me. It didn’t matter if I had no money - I found the money and the means every time. I know you can think back in your life and find similar moments where there was no doubt something was a must have. We all desire to be rich, beautiful, happy, etc etc.... but that isn’t enough to go get it. You need it to be something you MUST do - must have- in order to do what it takes to get it! Make it a must have and then go after it with all your might!7. Ready set GO!
As the old Nike saying goes “Just do it!” Quit procrastinating or waiting for a better opportunity or time to begin making changes. I hear it all the time - it’s Christmas, it’s summer, I have a vacation coming up, I need to pay this off first, FORGET IT! Remember the “must have “attitude? When you must have something nothing will stop you so get passionate about it, be determined and get going.
Change is hard but exciting! Humans are designed to constantly be growing and without growth life can get boring . We need to take this precious time we have here and make the most of it! So call it a mid-life crisis or maybe just a time for change but I am in it! Leave a comment below I would love to hear about your stories of change where you were unstoppable.
“I believe life is constantly testing us for our level of commitment, and life's greatest rewards are reserved for those who demonstrate a never-ending commitment to act until they achieve. This level of resolve can move mountains, but it must be constant and consistent. As simplistic as this may sound, it is still the common denominator separating those who live their dreams from those who live in regret.” Tony Robbins
